Different Paths We Choose

Sometimes in life, things happen differently from what we already planned before. That's very normal. I have this one friend of mine. We just talked over the free-dial phone of our university dorm a moment ago. Well, I can say she one of my closest friend here because we share too many similarity (no need to mention it here, right? Because the list will just go on and on and on). We traveled a lot and just had fun together a lot.


Both of us became RA (Resident Assistant) of our dorm from last year. For me, I just wanted to seek experience of international/Japanese organization while hopefully improving my communication skills and self-confidence. We applied together, passed the first, second and final screenings as well. We started together, as a close friend, while keeping in mind that when  things went terribly difficult and hard, we still have each other to back us up. Becoming a place we can share everything and release all the stress and pressure. 


Almost one year passed, and it's almost the end of the one-year RA contract. I, who was from the beginning, only seeking for experience and self-development (which I think I already had them as I planned) decided to quit becoming RA and move to live in downtown. I, who's just like a bird, cannot stay in one place for a very long time because I easily got bored and craving for new adventures and challenges. Then, I figured out that my friend might want to continue.. which means, we are going to choose different path from now on.


I cannot lie and say that I am not sad with this; I mean, we were all in this together for about one year, helping each other out, reminding each other to keep balance between job and school, listening to each other's stories, going through difficult time because of our demanding job that requires our scarification of our time, energy and life.. but, then, I cannot be egoistic and ask her to quit with me, it's her the one who has to decide. And I respect her for that.


The thing is, I just realized one thing. 


In life,  even though we start something together, in the end, we will go on separate ways. All of us has to choose different path to follow. From now on, there will be more and more decisions we should make and things that we should give up. We will have lots and lots of choices in hand and it will be up to us to let go some chances or realize them.


All of sudden, I don't feel I am ready to be a grown-up.