Thanks A Lot 2013!

Finally finally finally!! Finally I got steady internet connection to post some blogpost again after years and months... no, I just exaggerating. Oh my God, this is even better than any Christmas presents that finally I can catch up with the latest news in my life and write again in my own blog =)

But by the way, 2013 is over. And you know what, I never thought that this year would turn out to be one of the greatest year (so far) in my life. It's just so many things happened in twelve months and somehow made me grow to some extent. Here's some highlights about them :D

1. January: The Beginning of the Year

Coming-On-Age Ceremony with Indonesian

The Coming-On-Age Ceremony

My first Hatsumode

I remember I went for Hatsumode (first visit to Japanese shrine during New Year) for the first time in my life. Well, basically what we do is just we go to the nearest shrine (and the nearest for mine is about 30-minutes walk from Beppu station or 5-minutes drive by car). You guess it right, I don't own a car, so  me and two of my Japanese friends walked together until there. It was so crowded and people pray in front of the shrine. Throwing a 5-yen coin and pray to their God about their wishes. Also, they can write down their wishes into a wooden plate and hanging it on the shrine wall. For me, I took fortune teller and got 大吉（dai-kichi）or very lucky!

In January, I also had my coming-on-age ceremony or 成人式 (seijin-shiki). It's a ceremony for all grown-up in Japan (the age you are considered of being a grown-up is 20 in Japan) so you are kind of celebrated for being an adult. My sharemate rent a proper kimono but because I didn't have enough money to rent one (it is very very expensive, FYI) so I just wear my own country traditional clothes lol

Because of that, I remember being interviewed by local TV. Kind of weird having such a ceremony, especially in here, it turn out to be a moment to have reunion with your childhood friends, it's quite nice to have such an experience.

2. February: Run For Your Life, Run For Your Love

First Internship Experience

Yes, I got my very first internship experience! It's actually only a 2-weeks short experience where the main job was only doing some administration work such as copying, printing, typing, preparing tea for visitors, etc. But as I got my first job in Japanese flower arrangement company, I got a chance to learnt Ikebana (Japanese flower arrangement) for about 4 times, went to annual flower design exhibition, had first-hand experience about how to publish magazine, in-store experience where we got chance to sell ikebana equipment, had a Japanese shrine next to the office and stay in Kyoto, the heart of Japanese Traditional soul for two weeks for free! It was just awesome!

And I should admit, in this month, I started my first serious relationship (omg I really hope none of my family would ever ever read this blog!) with a local. It was really difficult for me to accept him at first, there was nothing in common between us, and falling for him was totally out of my plan. The only thing that made me finally accept him was the fact that I started to smile more and be more honest with my feeling after I met him. For the first time, I don't care about his appearance or how he dress, I just care about him as a human being. It's just a feeling like I feel I could rely on someone when I need to and as I started to get to know him, I just wanted to stay by his side and keep supporting him no matter how hard things will get. I had no expectation of him, as starting this relationship was out of my plan. So we started to have LDR or Long Distance Relationship.

3. March: Being a FLAG (Fellow Advisory Staff)

FLAG Spring 2013 Member

Finished the internship, FLAG activities awaits. Actually FLAG is an organisation in my campus where they are selected and trained to be able to conduct various orientation for the up-coming new students. I was selected to be a vice-president of Event Team, where I was mainly in charge of making a five-days continuous event called "Welcome Cafe" where the new students could have talk with senior students about the new campus life and stuff and also have cultural exhibition while enjoying some snacks that we prepared beforehand to be able to grasp the atmosphere of being in a "cafe". I learnt a lot from this experienced that actually I messed up the whole first day because of my incapability to bring everyone together and work in team. I burst into tears in front of everyone and I couldn't stop from sobbing for about an hour. I was really frustrated by myself and couldn't stand seeing the whole plan were ripped into pieces.

4. April: Redecorate My Bedroom

After some events, finally I had my bedroom redecorated! Me and my sharemate also redecorated our apartment such as bought a new dinner table, kitchen table and also I bought a new bicycle! Suddenly I feel more ready living in downtown :D

5. May: Have My First Income

So I was there, having my usual Career Japanese class when I looked around me and saw my classmate are so good in Japanese and they can distinguish and use Keigo or Honorific term of Japanese. And with my curiosity of never having a real part-time job outside the school (feel enough with having part time job doing some local exchange), this time I want to have a real part-time job. A real one that could practice my Keigo. The real one that could give me extra income. The real one like the one that Ashley Tisdale has in The Suite Life of Zack and Cody on Disney Channel.

I remember that night, after having a boring part-time job as a receptionist for the whole 8 hours, I walked into Lawson, a convenient store nearby my apartment and asked to the store manager directly whether they need a part-timer. And suddenly I got the job in my hand! But, having this job is not easy at all... trust me.

6. June: Birthday and Challenge Program

My 21st Birthday

Business Challenge Program

Okay, to be begin with, this month was my 21st birthday. Actually I was quite busy with stuff that I don't really care about my birthday. But seems the God of drama does not let me to have my birthday passed as usual that suddenly someone came right the night before my birthday. He was from my past and we hadn't met each other for more than one year long. I actually never thought that I would ever met him again in person in my life since he left. But suddenly there he was, in front of me, on the night of my birthday, wishing me a belated birthday and even prepared me some birthday present that really left me speechless. FYI, he doesn't even live in Japan if you know what I mean.

And I had myself joining a business challenge program with students from Tokyo University, Waseda University, Keio University, all of those Japanese Top Universities. The result from this program? I wanted to cry. I felt so dumb because the topic was quite difficult and the language barrier made me feel that I was the stupidest person in the room and my team member wasn't helping at all. Well, at least it made me realised of how much preparation that I should do (including Japanese skill and awareness of the latest news) if I really want to do job-hunting in Japan.

7. July: Thai Week 2013

Thai Traditional Dance

I joined Thai Week this year (finally!) and had a chance to learn Thai Traditional Dance which is really similar with Indonesian Traditional Dance. The thing is, Indonesian dance has more complicated movement comparing to theirs. But it was quite interesting to learn their dance and actually I got some close friend after joining this grand show =D


8. August: Brother's Wedding and Sydney Trip!

Brother's Wedding

Harbour Bridge, Sydney, Australia

My brother got married this summer! Finally, after going out with his girlfriend for about seven years and went through some ups and downs, finally oh finally they got married! The wedding itself was sooo tiring, even for me. We had some ceremonies and talk about the visitors, there were like thousands! And I am not exaggerating this time. So glad everything was finished after three days.

And I went to Sydney! My first Aussie experience in my life! Well, it should have been my brother's and his new wife honeymoon place, but because of some reason they couldn't go so in the end, only me, my brother's wife's siblings who went there and enjoy the sightseeing. Even though some happenings did happen, it was so excited and fun exploring new place beside Asia, I would say.

9. September: Tokyo-Hiroshima Trip and the Fairy Tales Ended

Going back to Japan, I went through Tokyo, not Fukuoka as usual. I used my Dad's mileage to get free airplane ticket. The only reason I decided to go through Tokyo that I need to meet him. That person that I hadn't met for about seven months and I could see both of us were falling apart. Something wrong with our relationship when I pretended everything was totally fine these months. I came there to save any last pieces that I could save from burning but it seems it was too late. Nothing I can do even when I came there. It might be my fault that be too furious towards our relationship. It might be his fault of not making any effort to win me back. But in the end, it was both of our fault for not understanding each other enough and blame each other rather than try to make up things. We just hurt each other too bad.

I couldn't stop myself from crying on my way back home. I never cried that much in my whole life. I remember sitting at the train in JR Yamanote Line from Shinjuku Station back to Shinjuku Station through Tokyo Station and it took about one hour. I didn't care anymore about crying at public, all I want to do was to ease the pain that I felt for months. I tried to be normal when I met my friend in Hiroshima and enjoyed eating and sightseeing around. The hardest part was arriving back at Beppu, where all the memories were just here.

10. October: First Concert!

Ikimonogakari Fukuoka Concert, 2013

Then the new semester as a 4th year student started! OMG cannot believe it was so fast! And the highlight of this month was my first concert in Fukuoka! I was so excited because I never gone to any concert in my whole life. Together with my share mate, we went to Fukuoka and watched Ikimonogakari concert together. It was quite awesome! And I am dying to watch Taylor Swift Concert right now lol

11. November: Miyazaki Trip

Travel alone to Miyazaki Prefecture

For this month, I went to Miyazaki Prefecture. With this, I went to all prefectures in Kyushu Island. Finally! LOL The very first moment I arrived here, I fell in love with Miyazaki. The sea and scenery reminds me a lot with Florida that made me think of my family and my childhood memory a lot. It made me want to go back to Florida with my family. Because I went there alone, I had a good chance to think about my future as well as the job-hunting get nearer and nearer these days.

In this month, I met one guy from SONY that also made me questioned myself whether I should really get a job in Japan or not. As I want to work in Japan to have experience, for him, my reason sounds irrational for him and I'd just waste of my time if I choose to work in Japan. Well, I got mad at him and just ignore what he said afterwards. But, deep down inside, I got mad at him because I know he is actually right. He just blurt out something that I don't want to admit. And when he asked the question, I couldn't answer. Simply to say, I lost my purpose to work in Japan. I don't know why I want to do job hunting in Japan now. Especially after I broke up with my ex. I mean, I could say that one of the main reason of us breaking up was because of his work. Others might think he cheated on me, but I strongly believe that actually busyness that made us apart. Busyness and his work changed his feeling. And I don't want to lose myself as well once I start getting job here. Also, my family against it so bad. I would never dare to work for long-term here for my family sake. But, if I only work for short-term, why should I get a job in Japan in the first place? I don't even dare to have dream now, because anything that I dream of, always against my family. That make me question myself even more: Whose life I am living now?


12. December: Job Hunting Started!

Job Hunting Mode

Winter Vacation: Taking photo with deers in Nara, Japan

Being Santa Clause in Lawson

So finally it's December and all I do is going around Company Seminar and Job Fair while wearing suit. It might look cool for the first few days but I felt sick already with it. Especially during winter, OMG I started hate winter because of that. And I went to Nara with my friends and successfully took one picture with deers! Other than that just being Santa Clause in Lawson as part-timer.


In the end, I think I grew a lot throughout this year. I shed so many tears this year. Moreover I started to think about my life more. What kind of value I actually have? What kind of person I actually am? What kind of life I want to live in? What kind of person I want to spend my rest of life with? For who I am living my life now? What is my purpose of life? Those questions are the questions that I don't think can be answer immediately. Because people are change. The environment change. People's perspective change. And that's just part of our life.

Happy New Year 2014!